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Love is (also) a matter of values

Love is not only a feeling, but also a value. A value that inspires us to develop ourselves and our relationships.


But how do we determine what we find important in love? And how do our values influence our choice of partner, our expectations and our satisfaction?


Research shows that values play a major role in our love lives. Values are beliefs about what we think is good and important, what we strive for, and how we behave. Values give direction to our actions, but also to our feelings and thoughts. Values can vary from person to person, from culture to culture, and from time to time. For example, today we value autonomy, freedom and personal growth more than in the past, when marriage had a primarily practical and social function.


Values can also clash, both within ourselves and between partners. For example, someone who values freedom and adventure may find it difficult to commit to someone who values security and stability. It is therefore important to be aware of your own values and those of your partner, and to communicate about them. This will help you better understand what you want, what you need, and what you can give in a relationship.


So love is not only a matter of feelings, but also of values. 

What are your relationship values? And how do you coordinate that with your partner's?

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